Friday, May 20, 2011

Being Alone

Being alone makes me wonder:

Who do you call at the end of your day to unload?
What do you plan your day around?
Where's your shoulder to cry on?
When are you able to stop holding everything in?
How do you honestly get through a day?

These are the questions going through my head right now. I'm so lost it's unbearable. I feel alone when i don't have someone to talk to. That's all I want! Just someone who will know me inside and out and talk about my days with. That's all I've ever wanted! I want to be put first for once...I want to be someone else's number one.

I guess when you've never had to do this since probably around 7th grade...it's a hard thing to do.Especially when it's been the same person since you were 17.

Here's another thing that's bothering me--How come guys can't have friends that are girls? I don't understand what goes on inside a guys head so I'll never get that, but also if there are some guys...then y can't other guys trust them...whatever....I'm over it!


I'll blog later about my exoerience at the Craker Barrel today...that was a first for me!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Prom Back Home



Just wanted to share a couple pictures of my gorgeous LiL SiS Stephy!! Steph just had her Senior Prom this weekend so I drove home for just the day to play paparazzi for a day. Makes me sad that she's growing up so fast yet SUPER excited becuz within a few months this little miss will grace the ISU campus with her presence!!! Steph is coming to ISU in the fall for school and I couldn't be happier that I have one more year to spend some quality time with her. Love my Lil Sis so much!

Anybody else think she should be doing some freakin' modeling? Maybe I'm a little bias?! :)

Sunday, March 27, 2011

5K-I Think I Can...I Think I Can!!

I decided on March 24th (last Thursday) that I'm going to run a 5K on April 9th!! Whoo!
This required me to run 1.5 miles that day and my first whole 3 today! I ran my whole 3 miles in almost exactly 30 mins...and I walked pry 1/2 the last mile! So I have a feeling I'll be definitely ready for the 5K on the 9th!
That weekend I'm driving home after classes on Friday at 3...Visiting with G-ma...probably catching up with Jenny before running in the morning...going to bed early...then Race Day! On Saturday I'll run at 8:30 am then chill for a little while maybe get a nap in...then drive back to Ames...get ready and go to work! WHEW! It's gunna be a long haul that day! :) Can't Wait!

On another subject...I have an interview at the Hilton Garden Inn with the Banquet Coordinator! This is super exciting to me because it would be a different job than I've done before! Also the location is close to my sister's apartment in Des Moines! :)

So wish me luck on my new adventures and good luck to ya'll on yours!!

Friday, March 11, 2011

Last Night in a Nutshell

So as requested by Jake here are my "thoughts" on last night.

Yesterday started with Beverages class...having a good time in class...just at the point where I realize it's hitting me hard...I get handed the 5th bottle to open....Awesome! It took everything I had to not make it obvious that I was getting drunk. Opening that bottle was a great accomplishment in itself! So class gets over and I'm tanked. I haven't drank for 2 weeks....and I'm ALWAYS a light weight anyway.

B picked me up and we ate at Cocos which was all a little fuzzy. Then we went to Cyclone Liquors and went to the wine tasting for class...where we talked to Cale -(he works there thank god! I might need him to refresh me on some of the wine I tasted!) Then I came back home and showered and got ready to go out...which required me to finish an old bottle of wine in my fridge and play Wario Smooth Moves for a little bit. While Jodi laughed at how dumb this game is! :)

B picked me up after his meeting and we picked up Grant and headed to "the bars" aka Sips of course! We got a beer tower for B ad Grant and I got a new mug with a Long Island in it. My first Long Island actually.

When we first get there one girl from a few of my classes is there celebrating her 21st. Her friend is at the bar getting a mug...and of COURSE this girl at the bar knows B because he goes to perfect games with Cale and she works there or something I don't really know or really care....anyway...they talk or whatever blah blah blah! So were at our table and I'm standing next to B while he's sitting down...and Grants on his other side. I have leaned in at this point for numerous kisses and hugs from B...Lets just say it's obvious he's here with me at this point...anyway...we re-situated and Mitch showed up (B's other friend) and now Me n B are across from each other and Grants to my right and Mitch is to my left.

Me and Grant are having a lovely conversation. B is bouncing around from bar to table...but finally sits down for awhile...This BROAD has the balls to walk to to B and start not only talking to him but touch his arm n stuff...so I turn my attention to glaring her down dramatically...Grant notices but keeps talking as to not make it seem like that's what I'm doing...but I'm being drunkenly obvious and I hold up my hand and tell him to hold on I'm busy....So I continue to glare her down...as of right now Grant's terrified and glad...terrified I'm gunna jump across the table and glad there's a beer tower in the middle of it in my way! :) So she finally walks away and I'm beyond jealous drunk gf stage...BUT me and Grant continue talking until they decide to go play some pool. We go over there and I had to pee so I go and run into Lacey--the Birthday girl from my class--n we go get her a shot (after peeing of course) at the bar from Tom. She said they're going to Cy's for pitchers. I tried to tell her to talk to Melvin, who's the manager there...but she's 11 sheets to the wind and can't quite understand me to I'm like lets tell ur friends...who does she run me over to but that girl! So i'm trying to save face and told her to talk to Melvin when they get to Cy's because he's the manager...THIS BITCH turns around and is like "why? Doesn't he work here?"...I'm like "No he used to but now he manages Cy's." She then Flips her hair and give me the cold shoulder. So I buy Lacey her shot and go on my way. Even tho at this point I'm to drunk to care and want to throw the bitch to the ground.

Anyway my whole point to this story is here are my feelings about this....
Anger-because I wanna kill her.
Frustration- because I don't know where me n B are actually. which means I don't wanna ruin this for him if she really likes him...but I WANT HIM and he's mine bitch! Which I'm not scared to show if I know that's what B wants.
Pissed off- beacuse I know she just did that to piss me of...ya I know it worked!

Whatever the whole thing pisses me off because girls are dumb that's it end of story! WHY did she do that...to piss me off. Ya well what she really did, unbeknownst to her, was give Bradley a false sense of-O I can be single and get girls I don't need Jen and that relationship crap. Awesome! Thanks a lot bitch! So here's where I am stuck between either were together or were not there's no more just we are what we are because I'm getting the crap end of this deal! I didn't know when he's going out every weekend meeting chicks n acting completely single (boys are just as dumb) You can't have both.
So yep there ya are...my thoughts and feelings for today...well ya there's also that feeling of death...the actual thing not feeling like it...that comes along with your first long island...which for the record I finished outta my new mug!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Last Weeks View

This what I just experienced last week. Beautiful Puerto Rico! I'm glad I went and had the time of my life! This trip just made me want to travel everywhere now!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Puerto Rico...Here I COME!

Hello Folks...exciting news to report!
I am going to Puerto Rico! I say this is unofficial because I have to buy my ticket tonight! Yes that's right no ticket yet. I decided on tuesday that I was goin to go even if it killed me...so this required a lot a fanagaling to get the job done!
First was telling to mom...yep try calling your mother on a tuesday and say "Hey mom I'm leaving to Puerto Rico in one week" She was excited because obviously we've known abotu this trip for awhile...just didn't think I was going. Long story...Anyway...
Second was my license...it's a paper one because I didn't think I was going and forgot that the "real" licenses take awhie to get here now. So that came in the mail today. TODAY people!
Third was my job...yep I was supposed to work the 16th 3:30-cl, 18th train 4-cl, 19th 4-cl, and 20th 4-cl. Went in to work yesterday and switched my training day and found a replacement for that wed (the 16th)...found a replacement today for saturday...and still waiting to see if Kelly might work my sunday...but sunday isn't a curcial day they would need a replacement.
Fourth is my 383 Exam. I called Burger on wednesday because I was just going to go in there at like 10am, but called to make sure that was a good idea...instead he informed me that making an appointment to talk would be best. Well he sented me and appt. requests and it was for friday...umm....so I emailed him back informing him of why I wanted to meet with him and that it involed moving my test...so I will have that formally figured out after class today. The last thing holding me back from buying that ticket is this test!
Wheeeeeew! This has been a hell of a week on top of this excitement! Now it's on to buying a dress and swimsuit!

Sorry about spelling errors was too excited to care! :)

Monday, February 7, 2011

Bring it on!

This is my week...

Monday
-Test in AESHM 342
-Lots of homework for AESHM 311

Tuesday
-After classes going to DM to get shirt (that I left at KT's) for the Career Fair

Wednesday (busy Day)
-Class at 9
-Career Fair at 12
-Class at 2
-Work 3:30-8ish

Thrusday
-Study in library all morning for...
-Test in Acct.

Friday
-Test in JLMC 220
-Work
-GOING OUT!!

....in a nutshell. Hope your week is going well. I'm keeping a positive attitude about this week or I'll never make it out alive!

On an unrelated note...a week from today is Valentines Day which will be the first time in 5 years I have been "technically" single! Whoa!